For Global Peace with Social Justice in a Sustainable Environment

Gangabehn Vaidya and Mahatma Gandhi - I

Prof. Dr. Yogendra Yadav

Senior Gandhian Scholar, Professor, Editor and Linguist

Gandhi International Study and Research Institute, Jalgaon, Maharashtra, India

Contact No. – 09404955338, 09415777229

E-mail- dr.yadav.yogendra@gandhifoundation.net;

dr.yogendragandhi@gmail.com

Mailing Address- C- 29, Swaraj Nagar, Panki, Kanpur- 208020, Uttar Pradesh, India

Gangabehn Vaidya and Mahatma Gandhi - I

Gangabehn Vaidya was a close associate of Mahatma Gandhi. She lived in Sabarmati Ashram. She was one of the oldest members of Ashram. She had done a lot of experiment on spinning. She was the one who found the spinning-wheel in Vijapur. A school for teaching spinning has been started here today. It will work every day from 12 to 3. I should like you to attend. Behn Ramibai showed me hand-woven cloth. It was excellent. 1 Everyone among you should learn spinning. It is easy work. I know this because I have done spinning myself. On my right side is Gangabehn and on this side Anasuyabehn; they have experience of the work. 2 Every day I think of writing to you, but what with one thing and another, I forget to do so. Today I am writing this immediately after the morning prayers. I was to have sent Ramdas to you for learning music, but did not, for I did not think it proper to disregard Mr. Jayakar, who has taken great pains for him. It would have been too much of a burden even for Ramdas to be sent to two places on the same day, and so I have dropped the idea for the time being. Nevertheless, we should thank the music teacher for readily agreeing to teach Ramdas. 3

I was glad to know that you would be going to the Ashram shortly. Kaka should certainly visit your place when he goes to Bombay next time. Tell him this when you go to the Ashram. 4 I am glad to know that you will be able to come within a month. When we are unhappy, it is certainly better to find fault with ourselves rather than with others. You cannot abandon your daughter-in-law. If you persuade your son and with his consent stay away for a fairly long period, she will, I believe, come round. If, however, such separation even for a short period is not possible, you must consider the unhappiness as inevitable and suffer it. There is nothing unusual if a mother lives away from her eldest son. Your son is obedient; you will therefore have no difficulty even in separation. If he provides you with the necessary money, his wife need not know it or have anything to lie against it. If this is done with perfect sweetness, reconciliation is bound to take place in the end. This is what is called domestic non-cooperation. The non-co-operation which aims at ultimate co-operation is moral. 5

We have no control over the future; we do not know the future. Even in the smallest things we are mere instruments; why then should we grieve? We must keep looking at what happens, go on doing what appears to us as our duty and be cheerful. This covers the whole of religion. Why not regard as happiness what you consider misery? Through misery you have learnt to endure. There is happiness in contentment. If we go in search of happiness, misery comes to our lot, and by enduring misery we attain to happiness. We are born to labour and if our life comes to an end while we are yet working and doing service, it will have been fulfilled. Please let me know when you decide to come here. 6 Whenever you get angry, you should ask yourself, “Against whom do I have this entire wrath? The atman is free from passion; with whom can it be angry?” The external remedy to control anger is to keep silent. One should speak only after one is calm again. You should forget past things. Just as we do not eat food left by others after a meal, so also we should not remember past happenings and derive pleasure or pain from them. We are entitled to take care of the present only; we should not think about the future either. Since you are not going to leave Borivli out of anger or malice, you may pay a visit to them if your son is very importunate. After all, you are not going to forsake either your son or daughter-in-law. You are going to make room for her, so that she may not be embarrassed and you despondent. 7

You may come whenever you wish. God will do only what is good. I would advise you not to bring your son’s daughter with you. Let the husband and wife do whatever they deem proper. The father is welcome to bring the daughter and leave her here. If you bring her now there is a possibility of the estrangement widening. 8 Please do not worry. You are wise. When I am fasting for the sake of dharma, I want you all to rejoice at it. God will spare me if He wants to take some more service from me. You too should have faith in Him. Keep busy with your study. Be a mother to all the children. This is not beyond your capacity. 9 I want you to stay there without any anxiety and learn everything. If you have any difficulty, let me know. I shall reply to you on hearing from you. Please let me know how far you have read. Why did the children go to Bombay? I am gaining strength every day. I am getting impatient to go there. But I am afraid I shall not be able to go before visiting Kohat. 10

I am so much occupied in regaining my strength that, though I have always been thinking of writing to you, I have not been able to. I wish to share fully in your sorrow. I wish to help you as much as I can to acquire all the knowledge and strength you should. Please do not be at all impatient. We do acquire, consciously or unconsciously, some knowledge where the atmosphere is healthy. 11 A leader means the most important servant. A king acquires the right to issue orders only when he has risen above all others in his ability to serve. His orders would then be, not for serving his self-interest, but for the good of the community. These days’ irreligion parades as religion. Kings, therefore, run after pleasures instead of living as men of self-sacrifice, and exercise authority only to that end. But you have appointed Gangabehn as your leader with a religious aim. This means that you have decided Gangabehn to be the chief servant among you all who are trying to become servants. 12

I find that you make mistakes in gender. In the Kutchhi dialect there are only [two] genders feminine and masculine. But in Gujarati there is a third, the neuter gender. You say ghar kevo, while in Gujarati we say ghar kevun, you say tamaro sharir, while in Gujarati we would say tamarun sharir. You will find it interesting to compare the two languages in this manner and will be able to correct your mistakes more easily. Such mental exercise will also develop your intellect. 13 Never mind if you commit mistakes. If you keep on trying to avoid them, they will cease by and by. Spiritual progress is easy for one whose mind is always occupied with thoughts of serving others. Since you are constantly engaged in such service, everything will be well with you. 14 Do not be scared by the news of my illness. Being scared is forbidden for all. You must go on doing your work as if nothing had happened to me. I visited Chi. Mama. She is terribly worn in body. She can recover only if God so wills. It will be good if on completion of one year, you visit your relatives and do some heart-searching. Chi. Mama will feel happy. Go and see her and give her what advice you think proper. Also hear what Kishorelalbhai may have to say. 15

There is absolutely no breach of vow in your going to Chi. Mama. A visit on such an occasion was naturally expected. Now you should return to your place in the Ashram only after Chi. Mama is completely at rest. You should make Chi. Mama learn this formula: It is none of our concern whether the body falls or lasts, the soul cannot depart. Why should we bother about the body? We should be satisfied with thought of the immortal self. 16 I am not unhappy at Chi. Mama’s passing away. The poor girl was in agony. And it was good that you were with her at the last hour. I have written to [your] son-in-law. We are left with the problem of what we should do about the children. The question now is whether or not you should accept custody of the children if he leaves them in your care and offers their maintenance. Please think over this. I am sure you have not been upset. I have been getting your letters. I may say I am keeping well. During the last two days I have been walking a little. 17 May all your devout wishes be fulfilled and may God grant you the strength to observe your vows. Your attitude towards the children is correct. If Damodardas entrusts custody of the children to you, you being in the Ashram, it would be your duty to look after them. But it must suit the Ashram too. Discuss the issue with Kaka. It is a different matter if your heart refuses to do so. In such cases one does not know instantaneously what one’s dharma is. 18

I can understand your wish to tour with me and at the same time serve Kakasaheb, but I shall not encourage you in it. 1. Kakasaheb ought not to stand in need of so much service and Chandrashankar should make up for your absence. If that is not possible Kakasaheb should become too dependent. 2. If Ba needs the services of anyone, she should go to the Ashram. If one who serves me needs to be served by someone else such a one’s service will not be service at all and I must give up such service. 3. Instead of benefiting by tours you would only suffer harm. With me one has to move from place to place, no studies will therefore be possible. It will be good indeed if I have with me some woman attendant, but she should have completed her studies. I see if Manibehn too remains longer, she would stand to lose. Her studies have already suffered. Deep in her heart she desired to stay. She is yet a child. As she had come here on business, she was allowed to stay. You should of course be engrossed in your studies. When Kakasaheb gets settled, you may certainly stay with him, serve him and learn from him. Now you should give up your reserve and learn reading and writing from anyone who can teach and offers to do it. Self-knowledge can be had only from saints. Reading and writing should be learnt from wherever it is available. Hence give up your idea that you will learn only if a certain person will teach you. A girl full of passion would certainly entertain such an idea. You cannot have it at all. But I do understand that you feel shy of disclosing your ignorance. You should certainly shed such shyness. As Rasik knows Sanskrit well, why should I not learn it from him? And to us all other boys should be like Rasik. 19

This time your handwriting may be said to have improved a little. Good handwriting and correct spelling are not important in themselves. But if they are not important, they also do not require much time to improve. Try, therefore, to improve them both. I understand about Damodardas. Now you don’t have to do anything in the matter. You should now devote yourself wholly to your studies and be satisfied. 20 There is nothing more to suggest regarding what you are doing. Your handwriting has improved. It will become steady with practice. There are still some errors in the language. Revise the letters after writing and have them corrected by others who know more than you do. If you will be humble thus and particular about correctness of the language, it will improve gradually without any effort on your part. You will not have to spend a single minute for that. “5..” should be written 500. A point is used to denote a nasal sound. A zero is indicated with a circle. 21

Your Sanskrit writing is very good indeed. Your Gujarati writing too has improved. I do not wish that you should spend more time in acquiring knowledge, but I would not consider such a desire on your part improper and would help you to fulfil it. If, comparing yourself with other women who are educated, you feel you lack and desire education like theirs, you have a right within limits to acquire it. If, however, your atman has come to be completely at peace with itself, I would wish that you should give yourself wholly to any one activity you like. But this is a matter of the heart. One can do nothing but keep on trying until the heart agrees to give up such efforts. 22 Please don’t think that I feel hurt by what you and other women there write to me. It is but right that I should know everything that happens there. If I don’t stay in the Ashram, I should help you through my ideas at any rate as much as I can. You were the one that started the women’s prayers. If you now don’t take interest in them, wouldn’t that be like the sea catching fire? It is your especial duty to attend them. I wish to advise you all with regard to the conflicts among you which have arisen, without sitting in judgment over anyone. I will not form any opinion in my mind before I have talked with everyone. I have certainly not felt that Ramniklal is to blame in any way. I didn’t send Radha’s letter to him to inquire and ascertain the truth; I sent it so that all the women may understand the problem, come together and remove the misunderstandings. There was no reason for anyone to feel upset on reading that letter. Why should we be upset on discovering that someone thinks, justifiably, in a certain way about us? If we have done anything wrong, we should not feel upset when told about it, but atone for it and thank the person who drew our attention to it. If, on the other hand, the person has attributed anything to us without reason, whether he is an old man or a child we should look upon him as an ignorant person and forgive him.

You may show this to the other women if you wish to and now your questions. I have nothing to say about the comparison with gold. You enjoyed peace in Bordi, Borivali and Matar because you were a guest there and were careful how you behaved. You lived there in an atmosphere created by you, or others treated you as a guest and changed the atmosphere to make you feel comfortable. But you look upon the Ashram as your home, you have made it so, and therefore you are not a guest there. You are all members of one family. It is in the Ashram, therefore, that you will be really tested. Anyone there may find fault with you, or no one may listen to you; but you must bear with it all. If you do, you will enjoy peace. In a place where there is no cause for losing peace, the peace which you enjoy is not real peace. What is the value of the peace which an opium-addict enjoys? You will have won peace only when you enjoy it in circumstances the opposite of peaceful. Be sure that, so long as you do not enjoy the profoundest peace in the Ashram, you have not won real peace; that, till then, you have not really become an inmate of the Ashram. She alone is an inmate of the Ashram who lives on in the Ashram when others have left it, and will remain there till her death. Unless the inmates live thus, the Ashram will not be a real Ashram. I have never believed that it is. We are trying to make it one. Neither you nor any one of us can say that what you regard as self-development is really so. The Lord has said that he alone goes to Him who thinks of Him, is filled with peace, even at the moment of death. It is, therefore, at that moment that we shall be tested, but who will judge whether we have passed the test? The truth is that real peace cannot be described, it can only be experienced. Ask the countless people sunk in ignorance; won’t we have to say that they enjoy peace? But in fact their peace is not the peace of knowledge. The peace of knowledge is like nothing else in our ordinary experience. Even the capacity to endure hunger and thirst, heat and cold, should not be regarded as a sign of peace. A good many murderers have shown such capacity; but they draw their sword as soon as someone says a word to offend them. He alone enjoys real peace “who has no attachment and no aversion, no love for honour, for whom the pomp of wealth is nothing but a misfortune”. 23

Ramibehn accidentally met me in the train. She travelled with me from Mohamedabad to Nadiad. She talked about you all the time. She feels unhappy because you do not look after the children. I told her that, if the children were entrusted to you on your conditions and if no one interfered with you afterwards, you would certainly agree to take charge of them. She had nothing to say to this. I am sure you write to her from time to time. Her ideals are good. At present, she devotes all her time to acquiring knowledge of the letters. See that you do not flee from the responsibility which has come upon you. It is now that the knowledge and experience you have gained are being tested. With patience, good temper and generosity of heart, you will be able to overcome all difficulties. Just as the sea accepts the water of all rivers within itself, purifies it and gives it back again, so you too, if you make yourself as the sea, will be able to accept all people As the sea makes no distinction good rivers and bad, but purifies all, so one person, whose heart is purified and enlarged with non-violence and truth, can contain everything in that heart and it will not overflow or lose its serenity. Remember that you aim at being such person. 24

I had hoped to meet you, but you could not come. You should lighten your work. I hope you have made convenient arrangement for sleeping at night. Find some time every day and give me an account of the state of your mind. Don’t work beyond your capacity and don’t make others work beyond theirs. Consult Chi. Chhaganlal about everything you wish to do. Preserve the utmost peace in the kitchen. Women should cultivate the ability to work without making noise. 25 Though a settlement has been reached, I shall remain here a few days longer. It is good that you attend the prayers regularly. You may work as much as you wish, but you should take rest at intervals and keep yourself calm. Do not work any time in a restless state of mind. Cultivate Mirabehn’s company a great deal and ask her to pull you up. She should do it every time she hears you shouting It will not be many days before you get used to working on silently and with a cheerful mind, and you will also get less tired then. 26

I felt unhappy when leaving you. You are bearing with great courage the burden which has fallen on you, but I see all the same that it has disturbed your equanimity a little. The Gita, however, teaches us that we should in no case lose our equanimity. You may certainly take any quantity of milk that is necessary for your health. Do not feel that you are doing anything wrong in that. 27 Prabhavati informs me in her letter that you are not keeping good health at present. If this is true, the cause must be mental agitation and the heavy burden on you. Please lighten that burden. Reduce physical work at any rate. If you fall ill, I shall blame you alone. The path which you should follow is clear and you must not deviate from it. 28 Please do not spoil your health by working beyond your strength. And do not feel hurt whether others work or do not work or whether they respect you or insult you. Only when you can do this can it be said that your tapascharya in the kitchen has succeeded. As you become less sensitive, the work will be done more smoothly and others, too, will help you. Acknowledge whatever help they give if you see insincerity and false show in anyone, non-co-operate with that person. How many persons take their meals in the kitchen these days? Do you run short of milk? Do all the persons come for the meals in time? Is there a little quieter now? Are you gaining on weight? I put on one pound during this week. 29

Remember well the two things I mentioned to you in connection with Kaku’s clothes. Give up your desire to work as hard as you possibly can. You ought to spend at least four hours a day outside the kitchen. To guide the other women assisting you, maintain an inventory of all the things if even after that something should get lost or spoilt you need not worry. Think what you would do if you were to fall ill for four hours every day. Our aim, after all, is to see that the organization runs. Running an organization means that the work is carried on not by one individual but by even new persons trained for the purpose. This should be so for all our departments without exception. No work should depend on any one person doing it. This means that we who are working at present must train others for our jobs. Don’t think that it is Kusum alone who should have fixed hours of work. Having fixed hours of work is part of running an organization. No organization can run without rules. An accident does not occur every day. What occurs every day is not an accident. If bread gets spoiled every day, we may do without it. We should think out beforehand what we should do when accidents like bread being spoiled occur. Even for that, you ought to enjoy some rest and peace. I see that this kitchen has become a hard school in which you learn something every day. You are being daily trained through new experience. Take care of your health. For the present, your food should be milk and fruit. Take in small quantities at a time as much milk as you need in the day. One is likely to feel tempted to eat fruit, in unrestricted quantity. You should, therefore, find the right quantity for yourself. Avoid altogether coffee and sugar or sugar-candy. 30

I have always thought that you and I have nothing private or confidential. Why should youth intake off enceif someone happens to read my harmless letter? But now I shall be careful. I will send this letter to you separately. Of course, Chhaganlal has been told that neither he nor anybody else should read a letter marked ‘personal’. All the same, till you reassure me I shall continue to send you letters separately. I suppose you are now quite all right. I did expect a letter from you today. But, you seem to sulk and would not write. Get rid of the sullenness. Remember the very first verse we recite every day: “When a man puts away all the cravings. Further on we recite: “Craving begets wrath. 31

You must have recovered by now. This year, I hope to exact much work from you and from others who volunteer. I think it very necessary that the Ashram should be free from all worries and that I, too, should be free from anxiety about the Ashram. Never give up your rest hours during the day. Bear with all criticism. Attend the prayer-meetings regularly. Save time for spinning. 32 Chhaganlal writes to tell me that occasionally you get fed up with the evils which you observe in the Ashram and feel like running away. If you know of a place free from all evil, we would both seek shelter there. However, if you believe that there is bound to be some evil everywhere, you, I and all others who regard themselves as belonging to the Ashram will have done their duty in life if they cling to the Ashram as it is and try to purify it. It is in the character of the Ashram that it will not tolerate evil and it is its distinguishing mark that this nature is being strengthened as time passes. The general practice of men is that if any evil comes to their notice they cover it up. It is because of this attitude that evil increases in the world. However, though evil increases it is in the nature of the world to remain good and that is why it continues to exist. Otherwise, it would have perished long ago. Reflect over what I have said, and remain firm in mind; do not worry; and keep your peace of mind. Regain your health fully. Do you eat some uncooked vegetable? How much milk are you able to digest now? 33

You are going to act like a surgeon. The least softening on your part will ruin the children’s interest. Take over the children’s custody and will mend his ways or you will cease to be a party to his ruin only if you tell him plainly that he will not get a single penny. Improve your health. Never subject yourself to worry. Having done one’s duty one should leave the results in His hands. Take regular walks. Sleep as much as you find necessary, take fruit. Do not give up milk or ghee. They did right in taking away Maitreyi. It would be good if she too improved her health. You have improved your writing a lot. You have yet to improve your spelling. Take Kaku’s help if he is there. Learn to consult the Jodanikosh. 34 You should not hesitate to write to me even if you misspell words. You have no reason to be ashamed of your spelling mistakes. If one were to devote plenty of time just for this task it also can be mastered. But it would not be right to devote so much time to it. Do therefore what you can. We value a letter for its ideas, not its grammar. Do settle the matter relating to Kaku’s father at the same time improve your health too. Maitreyi too will benefit. I do believe that girls too should have education. We shall talk about this. Our separation will end soon. 35

I did shrink when I permitted you to resume the medical role. But it will not matter since you will exercise it with care. Make as little use of it as you can. Improve your own health. Do not be embarrassed on account of the change of rooms. Let these changes go on. Indeed, do we ever have a room of our own? Aparigraha is an attitude of the mind. If we regard a thing like a pen as belonging to us we commit parigraha. We should live as and where the world lets us live. A perfect spirit of service will be born only if one could conduct oneself in this manner. 36 I know that you have a heavy responsibility. But as you have faith in God, everything will surely be all right. Withdraw your resignation. Regard both respect and disrespect alike. Never forget the smallest thing; if you have an orderly mind you will forget nothing at all. 37

Do not mind if you cannot help saying unpleasant things at the Managing Committee meetings; if you remain on it, you will get experience. One cannot learn to control anger and other weaknesses by keeping idle at home. One can do so only by trying while discharging the responsibilities one has undertaken. To run away from responsibility because one is apt to lose temper is a form of cowardice and, moreover, one will not then know whether one has learnt to control anger. Write to me if Lakshmi has been giving trouble. I will then write to Dudabhai and he will take her away. I am happy to learn that the Dehra Dun girls have shown their merit. Surajbehn of course will take time to learn things. Do not mind if you have started taking coffee again. You have tried your very best to give it up, but you have not succeeded. There is a limit beyond which one cannot fight one’s body. Take care of your health. Have no hesitation at all in taking as much milk as you think necessary. 38

I have had no letter from you for many days. Do write once a week at least. I think you must have been by Kaki’s side at the time of her death. If you were not, whoever was present should send me an account of her last moments. What is your present weight? What is your diet? How does Lakshmi behave nowadays? How is Raiya’s condition now? How much of your time do you have to give to making bread? And what is its quality now? 39 Recently you have become slack in writing to me, and I have always been so. However much I hurry, I cannot cope with each day’s programme of work and something or other is always left out. As I cannot gather the courage to resist the people’s love and enthusiasm, even at the cost of over-straining myself I yield to many of their wishes and am obliged to give them more time than I had intended. As a result, letters do not remain unanswered, nor can I manage to write other letters which I may have intended to write. I got your letter regarding Kaki. There is no doubt that she was very fortunate. She had no reason to wish to live longer. I hope Bal and Shankar have now completely got over their grief. I trust things are going on all right with the girls who have newly arrived. May God give you the strength for all such services? Your faith is such that you are bound to get it. Do not count the expense in taking milk and fruit. You are right in what you say about the girls. We give them much, but there is much stills which we can give and much that remains to be done. I am, however, sure that, as we have been trying to give them the basic things of life, God are bound to grant us the strength to give them the rest. We have not yet been able to train women workers who can give the girls all that they need, and no women workers from outside whom we would welcome have offered to help. We should, therefore, have faith in what we have been doing and keep patience. 40

Never worry, come what may. We have done our duty when we have done what we can. He is the Lord of whatever merit or fault results from it. Do give up the worrying that you always do. Wait till Nath comes there. Now you cannot leave your work to go anywhere. You must eat some fruit. You cannot coerce your body to build itself. I shall see if I can accommodate Lakshmi in some other place when she comes. Kalavati has lost her ornaments owing to her own grave fault. It was a good riddance, though it is painful that someone has stolen them. But thefts are bound to be there as long as our tapascharya falls short. Don’t brood over the fast. We shall talk over it when I go over there; but you need not bother about this either. It is all for your good that you could not complete the fast. If you had gone through it successfully it would have been an excuse for some pride. God has been kind to you; He has spared you this occasion for pride. Even Narada had his pride smashed when he was puffed up. Please do understand that a fast in itself is no miracle. 41

Nathji must have come now. He will give you consolation. I can see that you are firm in your decision but not calm. For the sake of health, take the necessary fruits as medicine. It is not a sin to take care of the body, treating it as a temple, but certainly it is a great sin to consider the body to be an abode of pleasure and pamper it. 42 I have returned it after correcting the Gujarati. Go through the corrections. You may go on writing as you can. Do not feel discouraged because of my corrections. If you go through the corrections your Gujarati will automatically improve. You must say to yourself. ‘I must write correct Gujarati.’ You will have been to Bombay and met Nathji. Chandrakant tell me you did permit her to come. Now her mother wishes to come. She wants to work and earn her living. She says she is good at sewing. But she does not wish to have her meals at the Ashram. I have told her that if she is skilled at serving and will give her full time to the Ashram she can have a room in Budhabhai house. If she comes, she will have to observe all the Ashram rules and will receive Rs. 25 a pay. She may be willing to do this. She seems to be a nice and good woman. Her husband is well-to-do but he gives away all his money in charities. Let me know what you think of this. Madhavji is expected to come with his wife. It is not possible to say no to him. His wife is an experienced lady. They have two fine children; they are like Hari and Vimal. 43

Do not mind if your language is not grammatically correct. If the grammar of thought is correct, what need for the grammar of words? None the less, practice will improve the grammar of words too. I do not feel embarrassed to address some women as ‘Chi.’ in spite of their being grown up in age. As you made me feel like this towards you, I found it natural to use ‘Chi.’ in addressing you. I am returning one letter of yours after correcting it. I would correct even more if I had the time. Do not be disheartened by my corrections. One who has made herself as daughter to another should not feel ashamed on any defect of hers being known to the latter. One who is ashamed of his or her defect being known cannot overcome it. Make your body strong and sturdy. 44 Tell me about the following things either at mealtime or during the afternoon or in the evening whenever you get time. To whom did you give the bangles on the Rentia Baras day? Why did you give them? To who are biscuits served in the afternoon? What is the quantity served if the persons concerned do not eat ghee and sugar? Does anyone supervise the children’s spinning class? If no one does so, somebody should be asked to do it from today. What is the duration of the class and when does it commence? 45

You have been doing very good work. If it is very necessary for you to go to Bombay for the sake of your sister, you may. But you should remember that such occasions will arise again and again. You and I can give no help in such matters. We cannot attend to two things at a time. When you are faced with such problems, you may consult Nathji. I am here today; tomorrow I may not be. I cannot say when they will arrest me. Here, too, there are rumours every day. So great is the power of non-violence that they do not have the courage to arrest me. So long as you maintain good health, I am not particular about your eating fruit. 46

The women who have remained there are also helping the movement. I have often explained that the Ashram activities and this movement are not unconnected with each other. For anyone who has given up fear of jail, it is the same whether they are in jail or at home. We should avail ourselves of whatever opportunities of service we get unsought. If women’s help is sought for picketing, all the women may of course come forward. When nobody else remains to carry on the work and fear rules all, let the Ashram women come out and lay down their lives to the last of them. Just now, many many women are coming forward for picketing; you should do whatever work falls to your lot. I have told Kusum that the inmates of the Ashram cannot be divided into two classes. If she joins as from the Ashram, she must sign the pledge. If she does not sign the pledge and yet wishes to remain in the Ashram, she can observe the other rules and remain there. Hearing this, on the very day on which the women came here she went to consult her mother. I do no know what happened after that. 47

Kaka writes to say that with his arrest you may become more fidgety. It is his considered view that for you sacrifice consists in remaining behind in the Ashram. I agree with him. Bear everything in patience. To preserve one’s peace of mind even in the midst of a conflagration is also an art; it is a form of sadhana. 48 I will not mind your living on gram and puffed rice, if you can keep fit on that diet. But do not deceive yourself. Give the body the food it requires and keep it fit for service. If you wish to come and bring with you the girls and the women who have not visited me, you may certainly come. Not that your coming will do any good, for you will have to run back as soon as you come. Relationships depending on the body are noxious. They are as transitory as a mirage. Why should we be blindly attached to them? Through physical life, we should cultivate a relationship of the soul and know that it never ends, that it alone can be pure and free from ignorant attachment. 49

I hope you do not worry. I often think about you. Write to me. Did Nath pay a visit there? For how many persons do you have to cook now? I am not writing today to the other women. You will get news about me from my letter to Narandas. Inquire from Narahari and let me know how Kamalnayan, who lives in the Vidyapith, is faring. Who has been specially asked to look after Hari and Vimala? How is Lakshmi? The manner in which we look after Hari and Vimala will be a test of our love. 50 I remember every day all the women and the children, but I do not worry about anything. Here, too, I keep myself busy and do not remain unoccupied even for a minute. That way alone can I have peace of mind? I can see God only through work. The Lord says that He is ever working without taking a moment’s rest. How else, then, can we know Him except through work If you do not read the translation of the Gita and if you have time, read it. If, however, you have no time, you need not read it. Devotion to duty is the living Gita; the other one is merely a book. I have written to as many persons as I could. But I do think of even those men and women to whom I have not written. How can I possibly write to all? I write to those who I feel specially need some words of comfort from me. 51

I remembered you when I was reading Ch. XII and XIII. I have written at the top of the translation of Ch. XII, which is short, that it is worthy of being committed to memory by all, if not in Sanskrit, at least in Gujarati. It is easy to understand it in Gujarati. When we know the line of devotion shown therein, we have finished all. You must have undoubtedly written a letter, but it has not yet come to my hands. 52 All of us are far away from our ideal and will remain so. Our duty lies in striving to reach it. Man’s ideal grows from day to day and that is why it ever recedes from him. You are ever striving and that is all that you can do. Our effort should be pure and unremitting. 53

It seems Kaka is getting useful experience. Write to Ramibai and ask her to write to me. I often remember her and Kamdar. What you said to Shankerlal was quite correct. We should certainly take in any Antyajas who may wish to join. Don’t be anxious to economize on fruit at the cost of your health. You must have read about Kakasaheb’s diet. If you wish to suggest any change in it, do so. He does indeed keep good health. 54 I am glad to see that you are completely at peace. In being content with opportunities of service which come to us unsought lays the growth of the soul; that is the only way in which we can realize it. 55 The family seems to be increasing. That is as it should be. So long as we have the spirit of service in us, people will continue to come. 56 Your handwriting is improving. Just as you may be said to have spun only if you have done it well, so also about handwriting. You may write only one line, but it should be neatly written. If we have resolved that every breath of ours will be for the love of God, then even the least important work which we do should be done well. I have written to Bal and told him that most probably he will be able to see Kakasaheb. 57

How is it that there has been no letter from you? You must write every week. Do you write to, and keep yourself in touch with, all the women who are engaged in picketing work outside the Ashram? If you are not doing so, start writing to them. Remember that you are in the position of a mother to many of them. You have no dearth of sons and daughters. We know that all those daughters are doing work which involves danger to their persons. It is but our duty to undertake such work. We may not seek it, but when it comes to us unsought; we should welcome it and pray for God’s help to succeed in it. Those women alone who, though outside the Ashram, observe the vows will be said to have succeeded in the struggle. 58 When I don’t get a letter from you, I cannot help feeling that something is wrong. Why should you feel depressed? Whenever you feel so, you should immediately pass on your depression to me. Whatever your age, from the very first day that I met you I have regarded you as a dear daughter. I can be both a father and a mother. You should, therefore, immediately let me share your depression and then be at peace. If you feel like coming to see Kaka, take the plunge some time behn is certainly guilty of one mistake, that she went to test Bhagwanji. Nevertheless, as long as she is eager to remain in the Ashram and struggle for self-improvement, we should let her remain. Our experiments are certainly dangerous. God will see us through them all, if we have but faith in Him. 59

Your son-in-law is released from earthly bonds. We have taught ourselves to regard Death as a friend. What would we have done if there were no Death? You can bring into the Ashram as many children as you wish. I understand what you say about Kaku. Everyone will get an opportunity. 60 The responsibility on you is great. God will give you the strength to shoulder the burden. Ambalal wrote to Kakasaheb. The latter is in excellent health. He spins and cards. He walks at regular hours and eats normal food. 61 If you think you are not worthy of being a daughter, how much more fit should I become to be a worthy mother and father to you? If I who claim to be both, am slack in my effort to be so, I shall have no place anywhere in the three worlds. Let us, therefore, not argue who is worthy and who is not. If a son or daughter is unworthy, the parents bear no small responsibility for that. I understand the reason for your depression. Instead of thinking that you have to do this, that or the other thing, you should think that God does all that and uses you as His instrument. If you think thus, you will feel no burden at all. It is God who carries the burden, and His shoulders are so broad that however heavy the burden we place on them He does not feel it even as much as we would a speck of dust on our hand. We should, therefore, forget ‘I’ and ‘Mine’. “It is I who do this that is our ignorance, like that of the dog who thinks he draws the cart”: this line by Narasinh Mehta expresses his own experience. ‘Shakat’ in this line means a cart. If we believe that the dog that walks under a moving cart draws it, then we may believe that the burden of our tasks is on us; but anyone who works for the love of God will never find his task a heavier burden than he can carry. He does not have to take upon himself anything. Tasks come to him unsought. He goes on working cheerfully, with God’s name upon his lips. You sing with sincere emotion: “Make me your servant.” Think over the meaning of that bhajan.

Also think over the meaning of the two verses which we have added to the prayers for women. It is the Lord’s assurance to those who surrender themselves to Him that He will carry the burden of their happiness and welfare. Why, then, should we worry? This is looking at the matter philosophically. But even if you and I feel agitated, what escape is there for us? Our relationship with the Ashram is like the Hindu marriage bond. The tie can never be loosened. Instead of thinking whether others are half-hearted or firm in their attitude, you should ask yourself whether you are half-hearted or firm, and that is all that is necessary. Certainly seek what comfort Nath can give you. Talk with Narandas and pour out your heart every week to me. If you can free yourself for a few days and pay a visit to Kakasaheb, that, too, will give you some comfort. Do not work so hard that you get exhausted. One should always preserve a sense of proportion in undertaking work in the spirit of service. We can do that only if we have cultivated the attitude of non-attachment. Non-attachment means freedom from the sense of ‘I’ and ‘Mine’. The saying that while sleeping one should stretch out one’s limbs according to the length of the covering has great wisdom behind it. 62

You should certainly write to me and let me know your thoughts on Manibehn’s departure, as also all that you think about other matters. Your last letter was all right. Let the world see us as we are. We should especially show ourselves as we are to those whom we love. No one can immediately put into practice his or her ideals. But everyone can strive to do so. This you do every day. Hence the end is bound to be good. 63 It is the opinion of an experienced doctor that to guard against rheumatism in old age one must regularly take soda bicarb. You probably know that I must be taking nearly 20 grains of soda every day in one form or another. Plaster may help a little. The cause of the disease is inside the system. This pain is a warning to you not to mind expense on fruit. You should live mainly on milk and fruit. If you let the rays of the sun fall on the knees that will help you. Eight in the morning is excellent time for doing that. Kaku does not tell me in his letter what work he has taken up. 64

But it was not too long for me. You should not worry about your spellings when writing to me. Your aim should be to explain your meaning, and I follow what you say. You have undertaken a heavy responsibility. But the Lord protects you. He has rewarded your work with success in the past and will do so in future as well. I am writing to Lilabehn. How can we help her if she herself does not keep up courage? We have resolved to solve the problem of women. In fact it is being solved. They have submitted themselves to a fine test. The whole world has its eyes on the women of India. Write in detail to me from time to time. If you don’t get time to write, ask somebody else to do so. You should make someone your secretary. I have received no letter for Kakasaheb yet. 65

I understood the situation better from it. People certainly give you credit. But exercise the utmost patience. You have taken upon yourself a great responsibility. But you should meditate over those three verses which we have recently included in the prayers. Those who work for God with His name ever on their lips, He makes them His special concern and ensures the success of their undertakings, and it is He who guides them; why, then, should we worry? Padma seems to have got fever. She has a swelling too. If you cannot judge what to do to cure her, get her examined by Haribhai. If you can judge what to do, don’t be afraid to apply any treatment you think best. Even when doing that, you should feel that you are guided by God and take measures which seem best at the moment; having done that, you should rest completely free from worry. Do not take upon yourself a burden beyond your strength to carry. Man has ill-treated woman and is still doing so. But the remedy for this ultimately lies in woman’s own hand. If she stops thinking that she is weak, she can be free this very day.

The really strong are not those who are strong in body. Ravana, who was a demon, that is, had physical strength, was helpless before the seemingly weak Sita,. I am sure you remember the story. Sita was under the protection of a boon to the effect that anyone who cast an evil glance at her would be instantly burnt to ashes. Ravana knew this and that is why, though he carried her away, he could not touch her person with impure thoughts. He had to entreat Sita to let him embrace her. He threatened her time and again in the hope that she might yield; but unless she yielded of her own free will he was, in spite of his strength, as helpless as a goat. Though physically Sita was utterly helpless, in spirit she was a lioness. We know the meaning of a boon. It is only a symbol. Every woman who has inviolable purity of character enjoys the same boon as Sita did. Any man who casts an evil glance at such a woman would be instantly burnt to ashes. If man has ill-treated woman, the reason is that she, too, has yielded to lust. Being enslaved by passion both forgot their higher nature, forgot that they were souls and remained mere bodies. So far as the body is concerned, man is undoubtedly the stronger of the two. Hence woman was enslaved by man and the impression came to prevail that she was helpless before man, that she was weak and always needed man’s protection. As souls man and woman are equal.

If a man does not recognize his spiritual nature but a woman does, the latter is the stronger of the two, as Sita was stronger than Ravana, and the other remains weaker, as was Ravana. Don’t believe, moreover, that this was possible only in the time of Rama. Even today there are countless Sitas in the world who require no man’s help and are yet safe against all danger. One such is Janakimaiya. You must have seen her. Whenever I went to Bombay, she came and saw me. She had not much intellectual capacity to speak of, but had boundless strength of spirit. She must have been good-looking in her youth. She embraced a hard path of service in the prime of her youth. I have known other Indian women like her, and also Englishwomen. They are examples of but a small measure of spiritual strength. A woman who has fully grown in soul deserves to be revered as the world’s mother. For those who wish to cultivate such strength, satya Yuga exists today. Your task, therefore, is to make women strong. That is the right method of securing justice from men. A man like me may guide you and awaken other men to a consciousness of their duty. But my capacity for serving women is limited. Women alone can serve women perfectly. It is my ambition, through the Ashram, to prepare not one such worker but many. An opportunity to do so has presented itself to us just now. If you have not followed this, ask me to explain again. 66

When we do not set out to reach a place out of our pride but are led by God, we feel on arriving at the destination that we have arrived not a moment too soon. Our task is a difficult one. We trust in God for success in it. Think over the verses in the women’s prayers. Every one of those verses would seem to have been composed for circumstances like the present. We should realize today the value of Draupadi prayer. 67 The report is excellent. You say that you saw no cow in the places which you visited; the position is the same in almost the whole of Kheda district. People are selfish and are simply not interested in keeping cows. That is why we have taken up cow-protection work. 68 By not attending prayers in order that they might help in putting out the fire, the women offered real prayers. This is an example of non-action in action. You fulfilled the real purpose of prayers. Moreover, one can go on repeating Ramanama to oneself even while running to the place where fire has started in order to help put it out. Finally, the person whose life is dedicated to service and who has burnt his or her egotism lives his life in the spirit of prayer. We pray morning and evening in order that we may be able to live thus, and, therefore, when a fire breaks out, or in similar circumstances, one may even drop prayers. But such occasions are rare. Pour out amrita against the poison which you describe. Violence is conquered by non-violence, untruth by truth, lust by self-control, anger by forbearance and avarice by generosity. 69

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